Showing posts with label numero uno. Show all posts
Showing posts with label numero uno. Show all posts

Thursday, July 29, 2010

Seven things I like - Part one

I’ve been reading the fruits of this particular meme’s labor for several weeks now, biding my time. And finally the day has come. Philip, from the blog the domesticated bohemian, has named me one of his seven “pass it on” choices. (The man knows not what he’s done.)

I'm supposed to write seven things that I like/love/whatever and then pass it on. With this particular meme it’s become common practice to write an entire post per item. (Some wonderful examples can be found here, here, and here.) And though I think it's a fantastic idea and plan to make better use of it later, this first post will be a tad short. 

Now, not only does this meme give me seven guaranteed, theme ready posts…but it allows me to finally talk about one of the most significant inanimate objects in my life.

1. The detachable showerhead

Technology is a marvelous thing, especially for women.

They’ve invented lasers to remove excess hair, turned breast augmentation into a veritable art form, and recently even found a way to create the kind of dimples you don’t have to gain weight to obtain. They’ve introduced us to such marvels as GPS, to track that special someone when he doesn’t want to be tracked. And digital cameras, so that when that GPS leads us where our womanly intuition knew it would, we can capture him perfectly. With his pants down.

New gadgets turn up daily and I, for one, thoroughly enjoy exploring all this generation has to offer…stalking not necessarily included. However, it’s often the simple things we appreciate the most. Things that never received much fanfare to begin with and have been around so long that we rarely, if ever, think about who made them possible.

Like the detachable showerhead.

After a brief and none too thorough search, I was unable to find the name of the person that invented it. But I came up with a theory:

Some woman remembered just how much fun she had playing in the sprinklers as a kid and how, if she stood over them just so, the world was suddenly a more bright and pulsating place. And this happened, I’m guessing, in the era that back massagers were bought as back massagers, yet secretly used as vibrators. Or do people still do that sort of thing? It’s entirely possible, because I once knew a girl that had a small, battery operated flossing device that she used as a bullet. She called it a cheaper version of the real thing, but in my opinion you get what you pay for...and she paid to press a button and hold it down the entire time. Seems rather like shooting yourself in the foot to me. I’d get tired of holding down that damn button, or my finger might keep slipping off and make it stop and go, stop and go. Unacceptable.

Anyway, so this woman that remembers getting busy with a sprinkler has the bright idea to make an indoor version that’s not only suitable for the vagina, but great for easy tub/shower cleaning, not to mention working those pesky kinks out of your neck and shoulders. Brilliant, I say.

I’m pretty sure you can get a fancy pants version that has a ton of settings, pressures, and such. But the standard four is good enough, I think. You’ve got:

* Full Body, wide cone spray for maximum coverage
* Heavy Rain, full spray which offers pouring rain sensation
* Jet Massage, oscillating massage for relief to tired and sore muscles
* Mist Spray, full coverage spray which gently hydrates skin.

I know half the fun is in experimenting, but I’ll just go ahead and tell you not to use the Mist Spray on your sensitive areas. Unless you like feeling like a bunch of angry bees are stinging your lady petals. And sometimes Jet Massage can get a little intense. Like, hitting Little Richard notes intense.